Hello readers! Welcome to our blog. The objective of Trendphobia is to provide inspirational content that empowers individuals to cultivate a better life for themselves. The journey towards a better life is often hindered by challenges and diversions. Among these, the persistent obstacle of concern for others’ opinions i.e. “What would other people think?” looms large.
We constantly seek other’s approval in our actions for it elevates our sense of sense of self-worth. But as easily a compliment from someone can uplift our spirits, criticism by others can just easily cause our self-worth to crumple. It is crucial that we ensure that our self-worth is not measured by other people’s opinions of you. Read here on How to build self-worth : 7 ways to build self-worth
Apart from striving towards improving your self-worth, here are some additional ways to cultivate a mindset to not care about what other people think of you.
Water your values every day
Our values are the most important part of our identity that distinguish us from one another. Our values help us make decisions in our day to day life. From how we choose to talk to others to how we choose to live our life, it all spans around our values. Values regulate our thoughts and behaviors, and shape us into the person that we are.
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When we devotedly keep up with our values and remind ourselves of what we stand for, we try to align our actions with them. We understand that in order to create a life that supports our values, we’ll have to make choices which may seem to please some and disappoint many. But if we want to bring our vision of ideal life into reality, then we have to go with what feels right to us.
Although it’s not always easy to make that “right choice” when we are subject to the judgmental stares and grunts of other people all the time. To make it easy, we have to keep watering our values everyday. The stronger the roots of our values, more firm we could be in making our decisions. The opinions of others will matter little if we are confident in our own.
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Stay busy making the quality of your life better
Mind your own business if you do not want others in your mind.
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In life, only those things tend to concern us that we pay most attention to, rest of it seems trivial. Improvement of your life should be the only thing that should be your principal concern. If you’re too preoccupied with maintaining your own health and happiness, you would not have time for caring or even wondering about what others think of you. When improvement of the quality of your life becomes your goal, everything else will become a distraction. Don’t let yourself get tangled up in the vicious trap of “what are people thinking about me?” These distractions will keep you from moving in the direction of success. So, keep your focus in the direction where you are headed with your ears closed to all the things that are absolutely unnecessary for your growth.
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Focus on “Why” rather than the “How”
When we judge others, we often use the word “How” –
How could he say that ? It’s so wrong!
How can he be so selfish?
How dare she talk to me like that?
These questions of “How” are more often than not, a result of pride and strong moral convictions. Our pride does not allow us to see beyond our own feelings and hurt, and our strong convictions of right and wrong restrain our mind to see things in different light. But if we replace the “How” with “Why” –
Why did he say that? It was wrong.
Why was he so selfish?
Why did she talk to me like that?
,then we can replace our pride with empathy and understanding. We can still stand firm in our convictions but this way, we won’t be too quick to come to a final judgement of a person’s character. The attitude of WHY can help us understand and maintain empathetic relationships with others. Instead of judging them for their actions, we can try to see where they’re coming from. You may help see them the wrong in their actions as they might be unaware of it themselves.
Stop judging others negatively
The Golden Rule says –“Treat others the same way you’d want others to treat you.”
The reason why we fear being judged by others stems out from the awareness that we do the same to others. To judge others is not entirely wrong, it’s how we come up with our set of values. By judging and comparing the behaviors that we encounter in our lives – of our parents, teachers, relatives, neighbors and strangers too, we form our own set of beliefs and values. However, we should be mindful of how we judge others.
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If your intention behind judging others is to hurt them, or to make yourself feel better about yourself or even if it’s for your own entertainment, it counts as a negative judgement. Judging others negatively does
not have any positive consequence, neither in yours nor anyone else’s life. When we allow ourselves to speak or think negatively about others, we do it from a place of disgust, jealousy or hatred. Remember, if we sow negativity, we can only expect to reap more negativity. So, be careful of your intentions and emotions behind making assumptions and judgments about others because, in one way or another, it will find a way to get back to you.
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